Love Your Life Not Theirs by Rachel Cruze

Author:Rachel Cruze [Cruze, Rachel]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-9384-0013-1
Publisher: Ramsey Press
Published: 2016-10-04T19:49:46+00:00

Compatibility Matters

One of the things I love about healthy dating relationships is that so much gets revealed when the couple starts talking about important things like faith, family, and money. The more time they spend together, the more likely they are to discover each other’s strengths, passions, and values.

Winston and I had been dating for a little more than two years when my dad invited us to participate together in a conference he designed for small-business owners called EntreLeadership.

Part of preparing for this conference included taking a formal personality profile assessment called DiSC. There are many personality tests out there, but DiSC is one of my favorites. DiSC identifies four quadrants of personality styles: D–Dominant, I–Influential, S–Steady, C–Compliant.

D personalities are hard-driving and task-oriented. I personalities are the life of the party, love people, and love being social. S personalities are loyal, calm, rational, and sensitive to people around them. C personalities are process- and detail-oriented.

When you complete the assessment, you get a detailed document that shows you where you fall in each of the four areas. Winston is a high C while I am a high I. Being around people energizes me, but social events can be draining for him. He loves details and processes, but I have no interest in knowing all the details about every little thing. We’re both pretty good at making decisions, but we go about it in very different ways. We balance each other out pretty well.

Because we went through this assessment process in our dating relationship, the experience gave us a lot of significant insights into how we were going to interact with each other—and what speed bumps we might encounter along the way. Assessments like these shouldn’t replace premarital counseling, but they did give us a framework to better understand how and why we are different. That meant we could better learn how to work together, even if we were coming at a situation from different perspectives.

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